OLD GRUMPY
[Our Curmudgeon-at-Large]
Our national bird is the flamingo, our national tree the Lignum vitae; our national flower is the yellow elder. The blue marlin is our emblematic fish of choice (especially when printed on paper). We also have a national anthem and crest and a few others.
Our lists peters out well short of lists of US state embracings. Some of them even have State insects! And, of course, state dishes.
If we had a national dish, what would it be? "Peas 'n' rice!" I can hear the chorus. And what? What would we eat with the peas 'n' rice? Now we have a Babel of opinions: cracked conch, steamed grouper, green turtle pie, fried jacks, baked bonefish... You can add your own suggestion to the list.
OK, the government says, let's get a team in from the United Nations to be entertained in The Bahamas without letting on what they are investigating. Let's see what they come up with to settle the dispute.
Tarrah! The official announcement, live on ZNS. Every Bahamian is tuned in to find out what our new national dish is. A subdued playing of the national anthem in a minor key in the background. "And the new national dish is... Meat balls and chicken wings!"
Well, you can understand it. Everywhere you go for an informal get-together, balls and wings are the food of choice. Go to the local caterers and see what they offer.
There's an old (and probably apocryphal) misconception by US servicemen that the British were quite well off during the World War II years while the Yanks were stationed there. At every house they were invited to visit they were served up salmon sandwiches. Back in those days, salmon - even canned - was an enormously expensive delicacy under the circumstances, that took up several units of a coupon book. Every British household had a small can of salmon just in case the King popped in for a cuppa. When the servicemen who were 'over there' came calling, they were treated like kings.
Meat balls and chicken wings... How are we treating our guests? How are we treating ourselves? Do you ever hear anybody say, "Hey, guys, look at this. They have meat balls. Yummy!" Put two marinated toothpicks together, dip them in batter and fry them and you'll have a reasonable facsimile of the average chicken wing.
Meat balls, Your Majesty?
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